Mortdecai (January 23)

It’s good to see that, from time to time, Johnny Depp can actually act (Black Mass). And we say that because the rest of the time he stars only in subpar movies nobody sees (as Ricky Gervais said, not even Johnny Depp watches Johnny Depp movies).

What is Mortdecai all about? Well, it’s about an art dealer/thief/detective who is tasked with finding a stolen painting. A pretty basic scenario, right? Well, maybe that was the problem, besides the wooden acting (from the entire cast), the poor direction, the laughable script, and so on. On a quite modest budget of just $60 million, Mortdecai managed to make just $47 million worldwide.

The critics haven’t gone too easy on the movie as well, Mortdecai scoring just 13% on Rotten Tomatoes (which is even lower than 50 Shades of Grey). What’s going on, Johnny? Why can’t you make good movies any longer?

We guess he is a bit tired. We guess he says that it can still work with the Pirates and post-pirates quirkiness. Well, it doesn’t – and Black Mass proves it. Unfortunately, another Pirates movie is on its way, as well as a sequel to the terrible-terrible Alice in Wonderland.